WHAT IS PUBERTY?

Between the ages of 10 and 14 most boys and girls begin to notice changes taking place in their bodies. These changes, which occur over a number of years, are generally referred to as puberty.




The changes take place in all boys and girls but they will start at different times and take place at different rates. Not everyone starts puberty between the ages of 10 and 14, some people start younger, and some much later. Similarly, in some people all the changes take place in two years, and in others they can take as long as four years. Generally they start between ages 7 and 13 in girls and ages 9 and 15 in boys.



Puberty starts when extra amounts of chemicals called hormones start to be produced in the body. These hormones guide the changes that take place in the body. As well as causing physical changes these hormones also cause emotional changes.

CHILD PORNOGRAPHY

Child pornography is a multi-billion dollar industry and among the fastest growing criminal segments on the internet.[14][15][16][17][18][19][20] Producers of child pornography try to avoid prosecution by distributing their material across national borders, though this issue is increasingly being addressed with regular arrests of suspects from a number of countries occurring over the last few years.[12][14] NCMEC claims that around 20 % of all pornography contains children.[21]







Child pornography is viewed and collected by pedophiles for a variety of purposes, ranging from private sexual uses, trading with other pedophiles, preparing children for sexual abuse as part of the process known as "child grooming", or enticement leading to entrapment for sexual exploitation such as production of new child pornography or child prostitution.






Contents [hide]


1 Terminology


2 Child sexual abuse in production and distribution


3 Relation to child molestation and abuse


4 Typology


5 Internet proliferation


6 Collection by pedophiles


7 Child sex tourism


8 Organized crime


9 International coordination of law enforcement


10 International Law


11 Artificially generated or simulated imagery


12 Sexting


13 See also


14 References


15 External links

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU MEET WOMAN FOR THE FIRST TIME

1. Practically eliminates ALL chance of rejection
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PossibilitiesThere are a few possibilities that we might need to examine before we really conclude reasons for this lowered sexual drive. There are some who are fed up with the same sexual position, but perhaps don’t know for sure that this may be the reason for boredom in the bedroom. There are some who are probably medically unfit for having a healthy sex life. Hypothyroidism is another great reason for low sex drive. Hormonal imbalances may not always look all that severe but the fact is that they are known to be doses of slow poison that seep through our lives without we being completely involved in the process.

LOW SEX DRIVE

INTRODUCTION TO LOW SEX DRIVE
Apart from the time when the sexual body of a guy was still getting matured, there
have been umpteen encounters of women who have faced the wrath of them being developed completely. In other words, ever since their development was complete, they have been raring to get themselves to charge at any time, so as to speak. Part of the problem has always been the fact that guys have posed as light bulbs at any given time, much to the chagrin of a female’s hormonal imbalances. The issue of getting turned on by the male side is not any issue with them really. Its with women who suffer most pangs of a lowered sex drive. While males would love to have sex almost 6 times in a week with a restful day for them and their counter parts most women would not agree for the same. Its probably not the same for the woman. There are many times when certain amount of medication that affects their systems, or even putting on weight that causes a hindrance for them to take part in sexual activities.

FOREPLAY

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MOMENT MEN FALL IN LOVE

If you don't know how to handle these


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WHY DO YOU EXPERIENCE PAIN DURING INTERCOURSE?

In Women




Why do I experience pain during intercourse?



Sex should never be painful. If you are having pain during sex, stop. Sex is supposed to be pleasurable, and pain indicates that something is wrong.



In many cases, your partner's actions can cause pain, such as going too fast or penetrating from an awkward position. Never hesitate to ask your partner to slow down or move to make you more comfortable.



Another common cause of pain during sex is the lack of natural lubrication in the vagina. Antihistamines or other medication may be the cause of this problem. Additionally, natural changes in the vagina during menopause may cause a reduction in natural lubrication. Or, in some cases, more foreplay may be required to produce a sufficient amount of vaginal lubrication. Adding a water-based lubricant to the proceedings may help alleviate this problem. We recommend Astroglide. It's a wonderful lubricant with a consistency that most couples truly enjoy.



Failure of the vagina and uterus to respond to sexual arousal can also cause discomfort. The vagina may be too snug for intercourse or the uterus may not be raised so that the penis comes in contact with the cervix during penetration. Use manual penetration to explore the level of arousal before engaging in intercourse.



The muscles near the vaginal opening may also be the cause of some discomfort during intercourse. Various problems can occur depending on the state of these muscles. Vaginismus is a condition in which these muscles are extremely tight and causes intercourse to be painful. One way to determine whether vaginismus is a problem, is for the woman to examine herself with her fingers. If she feels that the vaginal walls are tighter than normal, then it may be vaginismus. Vaginismus is not a permanent condition. It is usually caused by nervousness or anxiety. Make sure that you engage in foreplay before intercourse. This will help you produce a healthy amount of lubrication, and should help you to relax. Try to reduce the pressure to perform. Fortunately, few women have vaginismus so severely that they have to go for treatment. For most women, it is just important to relax.



Any inflammation of the vagina has the potential to cause problems during sexual intercourse. Infections of the vaginal region due to yeast, herpes, etc. can make intercourse uncomfortable. Creams, fabric or perfumes may also cause irritation which makes intercourse painful. It is best to examine the vaginal area or the products that are being used to determine whether they are causing this problem.



Difficulty with intercourse may also be experienced by women for whom it is the first time having sex. Breakage of the hymen and other sensitive tissue can cause discomfort during penetration. The best advice is to take it slow, or begin with forms of penetration other than intercourse.



Some psychological factors may contribute to dyspareunia as well. Those who have been through a sexually traumatic experience or have feelings of guilt associated with sex may find intercourse to be painful. These issues are best resolved by consulting a trained Sex Therapist.



In Men



What can cause painful intercourse in men?



Discomfort during intercourse for men can be attributed to a number of causes. One cause could be a result of snugly fitting foreskin. Occasionally during a man's first attempt at intercourse, tight foreskin will cause retraction to be painful. After a while, the foreskin loosens, and intercourse is more comfortable. Secondly, any lesion on the skin of the penis can make intercourse painful. These lesions may be due to unlubricated masturbation, rapid intercourse or STDs. The blisters caused by herpes can also make intercourse extremely painful. Finally, conditions like Peyronie's disease which cause a bending of the penis may also make intercourse painful. If you can not determine why intercourse is painful then please consult your physician.

LIVING WELL

Exercise is activity that you do on a regular basis (every day, or several times a week) for the purpose of improving your health.

We all know that it is important to take care of ourselves. When we eat right, get good rest and exercise, we feel better! It’s easy to know this, but harder to live by it when you are HIV+. HIV drugs can have debilitating side effects, or simply make you tired. When we are sick, it’s often even harder to take good care of ourselves than when we are well. Our families need us, our jobs need us – and we have a habit of putting ourselves last. Learn to put yourself at the front of the line. If not first, at least nearly first! You’ll feel better and you’ll have more to give everyone else.

HIV/AIDS CAUSE DEBILITATING ILLNESS

Over the past 25 years, nearly 25 million people have died from AIDS.1 HIV/AIDS causes debilitating illness and premature death in people during their prime years of life and has devastated families and communities. Further, HIV/AIDS has complicated efforts to fight poverty, improve health, and promote development by:2
Diminishing a person’s ability to support, work and provide for his or her family. At the same time, treatment and health-care costs related to HIV/AIDS consume household incomes. The combined effect of reduced income and increased costs impoverishes individuals and households.


Deepening socioeconomic and gender disparities. Women are at high risk of infection and have few options for providing for their families. Children affected by HIV/AIDS, due to their own infection or parental illness or death, are less likely to receive an education, as they leave school to care for ailing parents and younger siblings.


Straining the resources of communities – hospitals, social services, schools and businesses. Health care workers, teachers, and business and government leaders have been lost to HIV/AIDS. The impact of diminished productivity is felt on a national scale.
Through unprecedented global attention and intervention efforts, the rate of new HIV infections has slowed and prevalence rates have leveled off globally and in many regions. Despite the progress seen in some countries and regions, the total number of people living with HIV continues to rise.
In 2007, globally, about 2 million people died of AIDS, 33 million were living with HIV and 2.5 million people were newly infected with the virus.1


HIV infections and AIDS deaths are unevenly distributed geographically and the nature of the epidemics vary by region. Epidemics are abating in some countries and burgeoning in others. More than 90 percent of people with HIV are living in the developing world.3


There is growing recognition that the virus does not discriminate by age, race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or socioeconomic status – everyone is susceptible. However, certain groups are at particular risk of HIV, including men who have sex with men (MSM), injecting drug users (IDUs), and commercial sex workers (CSWs).


The impact of HIV/AIDS on women and girls has been particularly devastating. Women and girls now comprise 50 percent of those aged 15 and older living with HIV.1


The impact of HIV/AIDS on children and young people is a severe and growing problem. In 2007, 420,000 children under age 15 were infected with HIV and 290,000 died of AIDS.1, 4 In addition to the estimated 2.1 million children living with HIV/AIDS, about 15 million children have lost one or both parents due to the disease.1, 4


There are effective prevention and treatment interventions, as well as research efforts to develop new approaches, medications and vaccines.


The sixth Millennium Development Goal (MDG) focuses on stopping and reversing the spread of HIV/AIDS by 2015.


Global funding is increasing, but global need is growing even faster – widening the funding gap. Services and funding are disproportionately available in developed countries.

HAVING 12 CHILDREN

Having 12 children and a very old mother to support, Vincent, middle-aged Ugandan single father living with HIV, knows that his death would spell disaster for the whole family. “If I had died, where would these people go?” said VincentN perched on a stool with his legs outstretched

Fortunately, Vincent has survived. He said it is DART that has saved his life. DART, the Development of Antiretroviral therapy in Africa, is the largest HIV treatment trial ever carried out on the world’s second most-populous continent.

The DART trial has recently reached a remarkable finding in HIV treatment: that taking HIV treatment does not have to be accompanied by regular laboratory tests, at least for the first two years.
James Hakim, professor of the University of Zimbabwe Medical School and co-principal investigator of DART, said the health economists in the DART team who have analyzed the trial data have concluded that a third more people could be successfully treated for HIV in Africa if expensive lab tests weren’t used routinely. “The challenge now is for policy-makers to widen availability of ART,” said the professor.

Before, it was believed that a person on HIV treatment should have regular tests, including CD 4 cell counts, a measure of how well the body’s immune system, which is damaged by HIV, is working.

The DART results show that 87% of people receiving HIV treatment without routine blood test monitoring were still alive and well after five years, only 3 percentage points less than in the group that had routine blood test monitoring. This finding suggests that many more people living with HIV in Africa could receive treatment for the same amount of money that is currently spent on routine lab tests used to monitor the effects of antiretroviral therapy.

It could also lead to antiretroviral therapy being delivered safely and effectively by trained and supervised health workers in remote communities where routine laboratory tests are not available due to high costs or poor resources.

Professor Peter Mugyenyi of the Joint Clinical Research Centre in Uganda, also a DART co-principal investigator, agreed that governments now have evidence that expensive blood tests aren’t needed routinely for HIV treatment to be successful and safe. “It also means that treatment could be delivered locally as long as health care workers have the right training, support and supervision,” said Peter, “This could make a huge difference to people who live in remote areas that are many days walk from the nearest hospital or laboratory.”

According to UNAIDS estimates HIV treatment only reached a third of the 9.7 million people in need at the end of 2007. In Africa alone, around 4 million people urgently need antiretroviral therapy but the resources are limited.



The DART Story

Aiming at finding a safe, simple and more economical way of carrying out HIV treatment, the DART trial began six years ago when treatment for people living with HIV was just starting to become more widely available in Uganda and Zimbabwe.

Vincent was one of the 3,316 DART participants that had severe or advanced HIV infection while not having previously had any antiretroviral therapy. He is also one of the main characters of The DART Story, a newly launched documentary film narrated by Annie Katuregye. The narrator herself, whose husband died of AIDS-related illnesses seventeen years ago at the age of 34, joined the DART trial in Uganda in 2003.

HIV AND AIDS IN NIGERIA

UNAIDS estimates that in Nigeria, around 3.1 percent of adults between ages 15-49 are living with HIV and AIDS. Although the HIV prevalence is much lower in Nigeria than in other African countries such as South Africa and Zambia, the size of Nigeria’s population (around 138 million) meant that by the end of 2007, there were an estimated 2,600,000 people infected with HIV.1




Approximately 170,000 people died from AIDS in 2007 alone2. With AIDS claiming so many people's lives, Nigeria’s life expectancy has declined. In 1991 the average life expectancy was 53.8 years for women and 52.6 years for men3. In 2007 these figures had fallen to 46 for women and 47 for men.



Despite being the largest oil producer in Africa and the 12th largest in the world4, Nigeria is ranked 158 out of 177 on the United Nations Development Programme (UNDP) Human Poverty Index5. This poor economic position has meant that Nigeria is faced with huge challenges in fighting its HIV/AIDS epidemic.



The history of HIV and AIDS in Nigeria

The first two HIV cases in Nigeria were identified in 1985 and were reported at an international AIDS conference in 19866. In 1987 the Nigerian health sector established the National AIDS Advisory Committee, which was shortly followed by the establishment of the National Expert Advisory Committee on AIDS (NEACA).



At first the Nigerian government was slow to respond to the increasing rates of HIV transmission7 and it was only in 1991 that the Federal Ministry of Health made their first attempt to assess the Nigerian HIV/AIDS situation. The results showed that around 1.8 percent of the population of Nigeria were infected with HIV. Subsequent surveillance reports revealed that during the 1990s the HIV prevalence rose from 3.8% in 1993 to 4.5% in 19988.



A poster encouraging sexual abstinence in Nigeria

When Olusegun Obasanjo became the president of Nigeria in 1999, HIV/AIDS prevention, treatment and care became one of the government’s primary concerns. The President’s Committee on AIDS and the National Action Committee on AIDS (NACA) were created, and in 2001, the government set up a three-year HIV/AIDS Emergency Action Plan (HEAP). In the same year, Obasanjo hosted the Organisation of African Unity’s first African Summit on HIV/AIDS, Tuberculosis, and Other Related Infectious Diseases9.



Despite these positive intentions for tackling the epidemic, in 2006 it was estimated that just 10 percent of HIV-infected women and men were receiving antiretroviral therapy and only 7 percent of pregnant women were receiving treatment to reduce the risk of mother-to-child transmission of HIV10.

ANOTHER WAYS TO SHOW YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND

TALK ABOUT THE FUTURE The future isn't as far away as it seems sometimes. Talk about where you'd like to be when you're married 50 years, and work on making those dreams happen.


GIVE HIM THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT Don't jump to conclusions if your husband has said or done something questionable. Give him the chance to explain before you pass judgement.

LET HIM BE THE MAN OF THE HOUSE Although this is growing increasingly unpopular, it does still work. Just because your husband is in charge of the household doesn't mean that you can't share your opinions, it just means he's captain of the team.

SAY, "I'M SORRY" Although you may not want to admit it, there will be times when you're in the wrong. Maybe you've said something hurtful or done something insensitive. Never have too much pride to tell him you're sorry.

KEEP YOUR PROMISES If you told your husband you'd do something, make sure that you follow through.

RUB HIS FEET Steer him to the recliner and pull off his shoes. Rub his feet for at least 20 minutes. It has been told that this may even improve his health!

MAKE YOUR BEDROOM A LOVER'S PARADISE Turn your ordinary bedroom into any lover's dream without a lot of expense. Remove clutter and anything that doesn't belong, and replace it with scented candles and fresh flowers. Hang pretty curtains and find some comfy bedding. Place mirrors to reflect candlelight, and misting fountains for a romantic effect.

WRITE A NOTE ON THE STEAMED-UP BATHROOM MIRROR While your husband is showering, sneak in and write, "I love you" on the steamed-up bathroom mirror. This will steam him up as well, especially if you seal it with your lip prints!

PUT LOVE IN HIS SUDS I'm talking about a bar of soap! Scratch "I love you" into his soap so he'll find it the next time he showers. (You may not want to seal this note with your lip prints, though).

GIVE HIM A MASSAGE Go buy some sweet smelling oils and turn your bedroom into a spa! Give your husband a full body massage and work out those aching muscles.

PLAY ROMANTIC MUSIC Keep a good deal of romantic music on hand in your bedroom to help set the mood for romance.

PUT A SIGN IN YOUR YARDPlace a sign in your yard such as, "THE WORLD'S GREATEST HUSBAND LIVES HERE." Let everyone know how special your husband is to you.

LET BYGONES BE BYGONES If your husband has done or said something to hurt you, forgive him. Don't keep bringing up the past every time you get into a disagreement, especially if he has shown remorse.

BE HONEST Don't hide things from your husband. Be open and transparent. This will help him trust you more.

BRAG ON HIM IN FRONT OF HIS FRIENDS Men naturally rely on boost in their ego now and then in order to stay confident. Let him hear you tell others about the great things he says and does.

CLEAN HIS CAR FOR HIM Surprise him by giving his car a good detailed cleaning. If you don't want to tackle it yourself, have it professionally done.

PUT HIS PICTURE IN WALLPAPER Let him know that you still think he's a gorgeous hunk by putting his picture on your computer desktop!

BUY A BUMPER STICKER Put a "I Love My Husband" bumper sticker on your car.

WORSHIP TOGETHER The couple who prays together, stays together. These will be very tender and special moments shared between the two of you, as well as important.

EAT BY CANDLELIGHT Cook his favorite meal and light the candles. Take time to focus on each other, and to look into each others eyes.

20 WAYS TO TELL YOUR HUSBAND YOU LOVE HIM

TEXT HIM A LOVE MESSAGE Send him a romantic text message on his cell. Make sure it's sweet but spicy!


DO ONE OF HIS CHORES FOR HIM Pick a chore that he dreads, such as mowing the lawn, and do it for him. Watch him as he sighs with relief.

START A HOBBY TOGETHER Sharing a hobby together such as horse back riding, completing a home improvement project, or selling on eBay can help keep you close.

PLAY A GAME TOGETHER Have fun doing things together such as playing board games, riding bumper boats, or playing miniature golf. Just remember, if he should get the best of you, don't tackle him unless you're laughing!

SHOW APPRECIATION When your husband works hard, or does something for you, let him know you appreciate him.

MAKE YOUR HOME HIS REFUGE Let your home be a haven were your husband can retreat from the stresses of life. Do your best to make it a pleasant environment.

LAUGH AT HIS ANTICS Don't let the little things that your husband does get on your nerves. If you think about it, some of these things may have been what attracted you to him! He just wouldn't be the same if he didn't do these things.

PRAY FOR HIM Ask God to give him that extra boost to make everything OK. Let your husband hear you pray too. This will let him know that when you can't make it right, you'll ask someone who can.

CHECK BEFORE THROWING THINGS AWAY If your husband has some things that seem useless to you, don't trash them until you've made sure he doesn't need them.

CHECK BEFORE REARRANGING Ask your husband if it's OK before you move or straighten things on his desk or work area. If he has things where it's easy to find, it might make it chaotic if it's moved.

TAKE A WALK OR A HIKE TOGETHER Let nature set the mood for romance! Talk, listen, and hold hands.

DON'T EXPECT HIM TO READ YOUR MIND If there is something you want your husband to know about you, tell him. Don't expect him to just know what you're thinking or what you need.

LAUGH TOGETHER Forget your adults for awhile, and just act silly together. Also, if something should go awry, try to find some humor in it somewhere. This will also reduce the stress of the situation.

RESIST THE URGE TO SNOOP Don't sneak around and check up on your husband, if you want to know something, ask him to his face.

GIVE HIM A ROMANTIC CARDDon't wait for a special occasion to give him a card. Find the most romantic card you can find and leave it in his car. Don't forget to add your own personal message! Maybe you'll even make him nervous, wondering if he forgot an anniversary!

PACK HIS FAVORITE TREAT Buy his favorite candy bar or other treat, and pack it in his lunch with a love note.

TAKE A BUBBLE BATH TOGETHER This is self-explanatory.

E-MAIL HIM AN INVITATION FOR ROMANCE Invite him on a rendezvous with you! Build his anticipation, then tell him to RSVP!

TAKE HIM TO TEST DRIVE HIS DREAM CAR Drive him to a car lot some Saturday, and let him test drive the car of his dreams - even though you probably won't buy it.

LET HIM BUY THAT TOY Permit him to buy that toy he's been wanting so badly. Better yet, put some of your own things off, save the money and buy it for him yourself!

TOP 10 DATING TIPS

Top 10 Dating Tips




Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, be ready to commit to dating. Half-heartedness won't work. In fact, it won’t even get you half-way. If you really want to date, put some effort into it. Do some research and think about what you want out of dating. Prepare yourself for the inevitable rejection we all face at some point in dating and commit not to give up.

Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself, and others can sense that.

Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't try to be someone you’re not, but amplify and accentuate your positives. Throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. Your date will appreciate that you demonstrated some effort.

Think about what you want to gain from dating and what timeframes you expect. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do, then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.

Surround yourself with people who will support your dating aims. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Don’t sabotage this by sitting around with friends who are negative about love and relationships (often the married ones). Start attending social functions frequented by singles. Sitting alongside couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.

Choose those you have a good chance of dating. Be realistic. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous, great! Just know that others will expect you to be the same.

Join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups -- anything that might help you meet like-minded potential partners. You will not meet people by staying indoors and playing video games – many have tried and failed at this approach.

Take time off from dating occasionally if it’s not going well or causing dating fatigue. Recharging your batteries and keeping confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. We all hit rough patches, but don’t let your search for love become a death march. Date in phases if necessary.

Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not play a bigger part in your life down the road. The fact is, most people have something interesting to offer. While you may not be out on the dating scene looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.

Never make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. As part of keeping up the mystery, do not sleep with your dates early on. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. (And yes, this goes for both men AND women!) If the chemistry peaks too early, your emotions may never have time to catch up and the relationship will eventually wither away.

WHAT IS SEX ALL ABOUT

What Do You Mean By Sex?


Whether you want more or less sex, what does it mean to you when you say you want sex? Do you want specific behaviors, specific outcomes (e.g. an orgasm)? Do you want more intimacy, more connection or more attention paid to you? We all assume we know what we mean when we say “sex” but sex has many meanings, and you should start by clarifying for yourself what sex means to you. At some point that’s something you can communicate to your partner.



Define the Issue for Yourself

It’s rare that one of you will be dissatisfied while the other is completely happy. Even if you like things the way they are, how do you feel about your partner’s dissatisfaction with your sex life? Does this issue feel like a relationship “deal breaker,” something that will have to be fixed or it will destroy your relationship? Does this feel like something that is less important to you than finding compromise on raising kids, or work or family? If you find out that your partner prioritizes sex differently than you, are you willing to compromise to stay in the relationship?



Describe Your Sex Drive

Your interest in sex is connected to many parts of your life. Have you taken the time to think about how your own history and your current life have influenced your interest in sex? One way to explore this for yourself is to write out your sexual history. This may not be something you share with your partner, but having a better understanding of your sexual desire can help you take responsibility when talking with a partner.



When Talking Won’t Do, Write a Letter

Don’t worry about floral language or grammar. Writing down what you want to talk about is a great step to clarify your issues for yourself and practice the way you might communicate it to your partner. Some people actually write their partner a letter, and end up giving it to them at a later point. Letter writing can be a powerful way to communicate your thoughts and feelings, and if done along with talking it can increase intimacy in a relationship in surprising ways.

WHAT IS SEX ALL ABOUT

What Do You Mean By Sex?


Whether you want more or less sex, what does it mean to you when you say you want sex? Do you want specific behaviors, specific outcomes (e.g. an orgasm)? Do you want more intimacy, more connection or more attention paid to you? We all assume we know what we mean when we say “sex” but sex has many meanings, and you should start by clarifying for yourself what sex means to you. At some point that’s something you can communicate to your partner.



Define the Issue for Yourself

It’s rare that one of you will be dissatisfied while the other is completely happy. Even if you like things the way they are, how do you feel about your partner’s dissatisfaction with your sex life? Does this issue feel like a relationship “deal breaker,” something that will have to be fixed or it will destroy your relationship? Does this feel like something that is less important to you than finding compromise on raising kids, or work or family? If you find out that your partner prioritizes sex differently than you, are you willing to compromise to stay in the relationship?



Describe Your Sex Drive

Your interest in sex is connected to many parts of your life. Have you taken the time to think about how your own history and your current life have influenced your interest in sex? One way to explore this for yourself is to write out your sexual history. This may not be something you share with your partner, but having a better understanding of your sexual desire can help you take responsibility when talking with a partner.



When Talking Won’t Do, Write a Letter

Don’t worry about floral language or grammar. Writing down what you want to talk about is a great step to clarify your issues for yourself and practice the way you might communicate it to your partner. Some people actually write their partner a letter, and end up giving it to them at a later point. Letter writing can be a powerful way to communicate your thoughts and feelings, and if done along with talking it can increase intimacy in a relationship in surprising ways.

PENIS TOO SMALL

‘Normal size’ is a range that varies depending upon ethnicity and genetics. Size changes as a boy grows and matures into a man. As we all begin developing at different ages, size vs. age is really meaningless. Penis size consists of two components, length and circumference. Although most studies in this area vary slightly in the findings, the average erect penis length is 5.5 to 6.5 inches, and the average circumference (girth) is 4.5 to 5 inches. Also, a man’s limp size has very little indication to his erect size … a smaller penis tends to grow proportionally bigger than a large one does. You don’t specify whether your measurement is ‘relaxed’ or ‘erect’. Your penis is measured in a straight (or for some, arced) line on the topside of the erect penis, from where your belly meets the shaft to the tip of your penis.




The only proven way to marginally increase the length of your penis is surgery – and it is not recommended as the costs/risks do not generally outweigh the minor gains! Some guys try various massaging exercises such as Jelqing (on which we will be soon publishing an article) and some report limited success. Enlargement pills are the subject of outrageous and unproved claims by suppliers – they should be treated with extreme caution and (frankly) you would be better off keeping the money in your own pocket!



What should matter to you more than size is that your penis is fully functional and that you have researched and learned how to use it to please your partner. In other words, that you have become a knowledgeable, skilled & compassionate lover in all other aspects of making love. The majority of a woman's nerve endings are in the first couple inches of her vagina, so after that your smaller size isn’t much of a disadvantage. In fact most women will enjoy the sensation of a larger girth more than a longer length!

NEW SEX POSITION

sex position Tip #1-The most obvious part of any sex position is the physical position of your bodies. There are thousands of positions we can put our body into. Standing, kneeling, curled up in a fetal position, sitting with our legs spread open, with our legs crossed, squatting.


Sex Position Tip #2 - Different Movements for Different Positions

A good sex position isn’t just about how your bodies are arranged, it is a sex position that allows for the kind of movement you like in your sex. There are times you might relish a slow, even thrusting. Other times you might be in the mood for rougher, pounding sex.

Sex Position Tip #3 - Adjusting the Angle of Penetration

Many people lack important basic information about male and female sexual anatomy. The angle of penetration can change the way a sex position feels for everyone involved. It may stimulate one part of the body more, it might be more comfortable.

Sex Position Tip #4 - Getting Your Arms and Legs into the Act

When it comes to sex positions, we can focus too much on the genital connection, and ignore the fact that there is a whole body available for sexual stimulation. Arms, legs, hands, feet, can all be important players in an awesome sex position.

Sex Position Tip #5 - Finding the Rhythm

All the clichés about the “motion of the ocean” are true. Regardless of what sex position you’re in, regardless of how perfectly sized your partner’s penis might be, if there’s no rhythm, or if you and your partner can’t get in synch, the penetration probably won’t do it for you.

Sex Position Tip #6 - Speed and Pacing

I have a friend who says she can always tell when a new sexual partner has learned his technique from watching too much porn. Those guys think that all sex is, is five minutes of mind-numbing (and genital numbing) pounding.

Of course these considerations aren’t really separate from each other. Take this example, You are penetrating your partner. They are lying down on their back, with their knees bent, genitals facing you. You are on your knees in front of them. If you lift up their legs and hook them over your shoulders, or if you just hold them in your arms, this changes both the angle of penetration, but it can also change the way you move.

WHAT IS SEX GOOD FOR ?

There are all sorts of ways to approach sex. Being a sex educator I tend to take the most direct route (which, ironically, doesn’t always get me there the fastest). But I learn just as much from people who get to sex from a completely different angle.




With over 750 Guides, About.com is a great place to find people talking about sex from diverse and often unexpected perspectives. In this irregular series I’m going to point to my favorite examples of sex on About.com.



This week’s post features two fellow health guides addressing some often touted and less often touted benefits of sex. When the sex you’re having isn’t so great, or it’s been so long since you’ve enjoyed sex that you forget what it can be, sometimes other motivators can help.